A Court Room [n].
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, a black cat and a large brown dog are lying here,
Holy Jeremiah is sitting on a public
bench watching proceedings and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix is sitting here. Elauna Winterlight opens the brass double doors.
Elauna Winterlight arrives from the north.
Elauna Winterlight closes the brass double doors.
Elauna Winterlight says: Aha. All present, I see.
Holy Jeremiah exclaims: Aha!
You bow to Elauna Winterlight.
Holy Jeremiah exclaims: She's no judge! She's
not wearing a wig!
Elauna Winterlight says: Wigs are optional here.
You say to Holy Jeremiah: That's only a law in Klatch.
You grin at Holy Jeremiah. A Court Room [n].
Elauna Winterlight is sitting in the judges box, Latent Pyto Von PotHedz,
a black cat and a large brown dog are
lying here, Holy Jeremiah is sitting on a public bench watching proceedings
and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix is sitting
here. Latent Pyto Von PotHedz whispers to Elauna Winterlight.
Elauna Winterlight whispers to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz.
Elauna Winterlight asks: Well, I've reviewed the evidence, and I find it
fairly scanty. Does anyone have anything they'd like to add?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz whispers to Elauna Winterlight.
Holy Jeremiah asks: Is this a  public  trial or is all te evidence going
to be whispered?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: he did it!
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz blames you.
Elauna Winterlight says: The whispers weren't
related. This is a public trial, unless you have something to present in
camera.
Holy Jeremiah nods.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: the evidence is that noone has any cheese!
and that i'm not married to him!
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix boggles at the concept.
Holy Jeremiah scribbles notes
You exclaim to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Lies!
Cheese is widely available!
Elauna Winterlight raises one eyebrow.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: i have none!
Elauna Winterlight says: I should like to note at this point that I don't
have any cheese either.
You ask Elauna Winterlight and Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Did you ever ask
for any?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz asks you: may i have some cheese?
You say to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: No... er... I've run out.
You say to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: New stock arriving Monday.
Elauna Winterlight says: Run out.
You exclaim to Elauna Winterlight: Because I've given awat so much!
You smile at Elauna Winterlight.
Elauna Winterlight asks: That shows rather
a lack of organization, doesn't it?
Elauna Winterlight asks: And who have you given this putative cheese away
to?
(one) Pyto wisps: has anyone ever recieved
cheese from TGGM?
You say to Elauna Winterlight: I merely misjudged
the demand for cheese-products on this world.
Elauna Winterlight asks you: So did you in fact have any cheese in the first
place?
(one) TGGM wisps: I have the backing of the
silent majority!
You exclaim to Elauna Winterlight: Lots!
You emote: TGGM DeLaCroix looks to the crowd
for support.
Elauna Winterlight asks: Very well. And was
any of this alleged cheese of the Quirmian Blue variety?
You say to Elauna Winterlight: It may have been...
Elauna Winterlight asks you: May have been? Are you even capable of recognizing
a Quirmian Blue cheese?
You say to Elauna Winterlight: Well... it's... cheese-like. In many ways.
Elauna Winterlight says to you: So are a number of other things. Other cheeses,
for instance.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: and ceres' feet!
You ask Elauna Winterlight: Exactly! So who can be sure whether the cheese
I had was indeed Quirmian, or Blue?
Elauna Winterlight says to you: Well, I submit that as the alleged expert
on cheese, you have a duty to be able to tell them apart when needed.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: guilty!
You say to Elauna Winterlight: Well, I admit, the cheese I had may have
had a certain farmhouse-ish-ness to it...
You say to Elauna Winterlight: (That is, farmhouse cheese, not just farmhouses,
you understand)
Elauna Winterlight asks: Very well, then, I think I've heard enough to draw
a conclusion on this issue. But let's proceed to the second charge, shall
we?
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix sighs in relief.
You ask Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix: Hey, noone
forced you to come watch my trial, did they? You see Latent Pyto Von PotHedz the Experienced Larcenist.
He is a strapping young human lad.
He is in good shape.
He is lying.
He is surrounded by a soft yellow glow.
Holding : a thief's dagger (left hand) and
a thief's dagger (right hand).
Wearing : a pair of priests, a fluffy pink
towel, a large backpack, a swag bag, a deep blue velvet cape, a domino mask,
a metal helm, a fruitbat flavoured badge, a yellow stone ring, a Flaming
Cabbage brooch, an amulet of confession, a gold ring and a stealth watch.
Carrying: a half rotten pumpkin, a Thieves' Guild Licence and a stick.
His purse is bulging with coins. You ask Elauna Winterlight: And as for this second
issue. Just look at PyTo here. Would you marry that?
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to you: no, for a while there I was afraid
it was actual houses present in the cheese
Elauna Winterlight says to you: This is a very good point.
You nod in understanding at Mistress Lilah
DeLaCroix.
The large brown dog looks alert.
You notice Latent Pyto Von PotHedz nearby.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz does a really complicated
break-dance manoeuvre.
You say to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Ha ha,
nobody likes you.
Elauna Winterlight asks Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Do you have any evidence
in support of your allegation that the lack of marital relations amounts
to a criminal act?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: yes!
You smirk at Latent Pyto Von PotHedz.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: well actually
errrrrrrrr no
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: 320 says i can try him for anything:(
You exclaim to Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Oh come on, be inventive!
Elauna Winterlight asks Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Ah. I see. Well, then,
do you wish to drop the accusation?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: ok! yes! i should be mr God Of Cheese!
and i request a law that states i get what i want!
Elauna Winterlight says: Law 320 does say that! But if I decide it's not
a crime, or not even sufficiently interesting, I can dismiss it and find
you guilty of wasting court time.
Holy Jeremiah woos.
You cheer enthusiastically at Elauna Winterlight.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz moans.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz asks: i mean drop the
case?
Holy Jeremiah scribbles "at this point the
judge became agressive and threatened the prosecutor"
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: ok! i'll
accept it!
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: gimme a wierd title:(
You ask Holy Jeremiah: Do I get a cut of the pay for this article?
You grin at Holy Jeremiah.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix laughs at Holy Jeremiah.
Elauna Winterlight says: Well, I'm not going
to charge you with wasting court time myself, principally because if I did,
we'd have to go to the bother of finding another magistrate to send you down.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: I could accuse him if you like.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: yeah go TGGM!
Elauna Winterlight says to you: If you wish to propose a countersuit, that
is of course your privilege.
You exclaim: Ooh!
B O U N C E ! !
Elauna Winterlight exclaims to Latent Pyto
Von PotHedz: And consider this a warning - before you make wild accusations,
ensure that you have, or can make up, the evidence to support them!
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: bah ok
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz asks: will you approve my application now?
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix grins.
Holy Jeremiah snorts.
Elauna Winterlight says: Patience, young, er,
thingy.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz grins. Adding in a case with pyto people and a short description of wasting court
time.
Your note is:
He brought a frivolous case before the judge, wasting both her valuable
time and the time of the poor, innocent victim of his cruel suit. {Disconected here} Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix comforts you.
You say: I mjst apologise for the delay, my
computer crashed.
Elauna Winterlight nods understandingly.
Elauna Winterlight tells you: "TGGM DeLaCroix,
for this crime of vile and iniquitous negligence, I sentence you to a period
of banishment from this city. I trust you will use the time profitably in
importing more cheese from Quirm. Have you anything to say?" (repeat sayto)
You say: Now, I'll get back to opening that
case. It doesn't seem to have saved.
Elauna Winterlight says: I closed it.
Holy Jeremiah exclaims: You've been banished!
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix comforts you.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: I meant my one
against Pyto.
Elauna Winterlight says to you: Ditto.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: i got the offensive title
Elauna Winterlight says to you: He is now officially Offensive for almost
another hour.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: But as to that banishing, I shall be a martyr
to the repressed people of the the nation. Without the, you know, dying bit.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz grins.
Holy Jeremiah scribbles "...and then the  magistrate went completely beserk"
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix grins at Holy Jeremiah. You see Latent Pyto Von PotHedz the Experienced Larcenist. Elauna Winterlight asks you: And when you return,
you will be their hero, since you will return upon a high-piled cart of Quirmian
Blue Cheese, yes?
You say to Elauna Winterlight: He doesn't look very offensive to me...
You say to Elauna Winterlight: Possibly...
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: wanna try me
You ask Elauna Winterlight: Do you think farmhouse cheese will be suffiecient?
Elauna Winterlight says to you: Well, you were the one who was saying you
wouldn't marry him.
Holy Jeremiah says: He look latent
Elauna Winterlight says to you: Cheese is cheese, only Quirmians can tell
the difference, really.
You agree with Holy Jeremiah wholeheartedly.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: Oh, now you
admit that.
You grin at Elauna Winterlight.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix grins.
Elauna Winterlight closes the case #496 against tggm with a result
of banishment for 1 days.
You ask Elauna Winterlight: So how long am I banished
for anyway?
Elauna Winterlight exclaims to you: One day. That should be sufficient!
You say to Elauna Winterlight: Well, if you say so...
Elauna Winterlight raps her gavel. "Court dismissed.
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen." Elauna Winterlight stands up.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: By the way, you need
bailifs.
You say to Elauna Winterlight: I mean, someone should be here to drag me
away.
Holy Jeremiah says: And  you'd look moreauthoratitive in a wig
Elauna Winterlight says to you: I know, it's terrible the way we keep going
through them.
Elauna Winterlight says: A wig? You want to ruin my hairstyle? Tsk.
Holy Jeremiah says: As long as it wasn't blonde
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix removes the pointy black hat so she can
remove the blonde wig.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix wears the pointy black hat.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix blushes.
You ask: Who wants to wander down to the watch
house with me to see me get run out of town?
Holy Jeremiah says: You look much more intelligent now
You smirk at Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix exclaims: me!
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz exclaims: me!
Holy Jeremiah follows you.
You say to Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix and Latent Pyto
Von PotHedz: OK, follow me.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follows you.
Elauna Winterlight exclaims: Enjoy!
Elauna Winterlight waves.
Elauna Winterlight opens the brass double doors.
Elauna Winterlight leaves north.
Elauna Winterlight closes the brass double doors.
You ask Latent Pyto Von PotHedz: Going to follow?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz says: am
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to Holy Jeremiah: aww, but now I look like
I could actually think of a plan, they'll expect me :P
Holy Jeremiah smiles at Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix. {We went to the watchhouse} You trudge up the steps and through the front door of the Watch House.
The northeastern part of the main hall [w,s,n,e].
A large patched dog and Constable Dorfl are standing here. Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix arrive
from the north.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you.
You close the heavy oaken door.
You ask Constable Dorfl: Hello?
You say to Constable Dorfl: Criminal walking around free here.
You wave to Constable Dorfl. Constable Dorfl is a golem, an artificial creature made of clay.  Some efforts
have been made to make him look as human as possible for a seven-foot clay
man with triangular eyes that emit a red glow.  However, as golems are very
durable, his shell looks more like a patchwork of different kinds of clay
where he had to be repaired, most of the time by himself.
It is in good shape.
It is standing.
Wearing : an AMCW badge. Latent Pyto Von PotHedz kicks Constable Dorfl.
You mutter something about golems under your breath. The southeastern part of the main hall [n,w,e].Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix arrive
from the north.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you.
Holy Jeremiah says: I think my article could turn
into one on dereliction of duty in the watch
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to you: quick kick him! I want to see you
pay! (jk) {Walk along corridor} You walk up to the first floor.
A corridor [w,d].
A watchman is standing here.Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix skip
up the stairs from below.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you. You ask the watchman: Er, hi. Do you think you could
possibly run me out of town?
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz laughs.
Holy Jeremiah pokes the watchman.
You smile at the watchman.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to you: you know
you wanna kick him :P
You say to Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix: I'm a pacifist, thankyou.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz kicks the watchman. {We walked to Carrot's room} This is the private room of Captain Carrot Ironfounderson.  It doesn't show
signs of much care, although this does
not mean that it is dirty or untidy in here; on the contrary, it is extremely
clean.  It's just that it does not
seem as if Carrot would really live here.  There are some sheets pinned
to the east wall above a simple bed with a
clothes chest at its end.  A small table and a chair are standing in front
of the windows in the north and east
wall, the first being a quite large one showing Pseudopolis Yard and the
second a smaller one presenting a view on
the north end of Lower Broadway.  The main feature of the south wall is
the oak door which leads back into the
corridor.  Another sheet is pinned onto the wall beside it.
There is one obvious exit: south.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix, Holy Jeremiah and Latent Pyto Von PotHedz are
standing here. Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says: well that's just disapointing
Holy Jeremiah asks: Do council punishments work at all?
You say: Hmm, and Carrot's not home. I'm sure he'd love to see justice done.
You say to Holy Jeremiah: I'm starting to think that they don't.
(Ankh-morporkcouncil) Jeremiah wisps: The watch
are useless....they wont run TGGM outof town
You scry Captain Carrot with your crystal ball.
You say: Hmm, Carrot's apparently on Street of Bookkeepers,
we could go find him. You open the south door.
A corridor [n,e,w,s].
Constable Shoe is standing here.Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix arrive
from the north.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you.
You close the wooden door. {Leave watchhouse} You open the heavy oaken door.
You walk through the front door and trudge down the steps to Pseudopolis
Yard.
Pseudopolis Yard [s,e,nw,sw].
A watchman and a happy troll are standing here.
A street lamp is emitting a grimy light here and a wooden pole with a black
note attached to it is casually placed in a corner.Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix emerge
from the Watch House and trudge down the steps.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you.
You close the heavy oaken door. You ask the watchman: Will you at least frown dissaprovingly
at me? {We go find carrot} Junction of the Street of Small Gods, Baker Street and the Street of Bookkeepers
[n,e,s,sw].
Captain Carrot is standing here.Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix arrive
from the south.
Latent Pyto Von PotHedz, Holy Jeremiah and Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix follow
you.
Captain Carrot says: Hello, Lilah.
Captain Carrot greets Holy Jeremiah.
Captain Carrot says: Good evening, Jeremiah.
I hope you are well.
Captain Carrot says: Hello, Pyto.
Captain Carrot smiles at you.
Captain Carrot asks: Hello, TGGM.  Lovely evening,
isn't it?
Captain Carrot leaves east.
Holy Jeremiah exclaims: He's your  friend!
You loudly exclaim: Lovely evening!
Captain Carrot arrives from the east.
You loudly ask: That's all he's got to say to a banished
criminal!?
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to you: you disgust me, you can't even get
man-handled out of town
Captain Carrot leaves north.
(Ankh-morporkcouncil) Jeremiah wisps: I think the
magistrates need to get the punishments lookedinto, they dont seem to be
working
(one) TGGM wisps: OK, I just got sentenced
to banishment from AM, so I go find captain Carrot: "Captain Carrot smiles
at you." "Captain Carrot asks: Hello, TGGM. Lovely evening, isn't it?" "Captain
Carrot leaves east." - The watch are worse than bloody useless. ;-)
You mutter under your breath at Mistress Lilah
DeLaCroix.
(one) Jeremiah wisps that he sniggers
Emknaps rolls around on the floor laughing
at you.
Captain Carrot arrives from the north.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix says to you: big talk, little
show
You exclaim to Captain Carrot: Hey, arrest me, damnit!
(one) Delusion wisps: Can we come hunt you down?
:P
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix grins at you.
(one) Nate wisps: I can trans you to Jeremy's
jail if you're the desperate :P
Captain Carrot leaves east.
(one) TGGM wisps: Ooh, that sounds fun, Nate. :-D
Captain Carrot arrives from the east.
You ask: I give up. Wanna go back to the Drum for
a beer?
Holy Jeremiah says: Hello carrot
Captain Carrot exclaims: Ah, good to see so many people having fun!
Captain Carrot says: Hello Jeremiah.
Captain Carrot smiles at Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix,
Holy Jeremiah, Latent Pyto Von PotHedz and you.
Mistress Lilah DeLaCroix shrugs at you.
Captain Carrot leaves east.
{I portal to drum where I bought everyone a beer}